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Guest 3. Will Ward

19/2/18


Will Ward moved to London in October 2016


I’m sitting in the café on the first floor of the KCL Strand Campus drinking a smoothie I prepped the night before. I’ve just come out of a lecture on Aristotle and I’ve got a seminar at eleven. It’s sunny today. I’m going home this weekend to babysit my brother while my parents are on holiday. I’ve asked my mum to buy me some Meridian Hazelnut and Cocoa Spread. This little gem is basically healthy Nutella. Hazelnut butter mixed with cocoa, coconut, sunflower oil and a little bit of honey. Later today I’ll go to Fernandez & Wells at Somerset House with some friends and have lunch. The coffee there is okay but I prefer Press. Some girl with rounded turtle glasses and curly black hair walks over to the drinks rack. My phone’s on airplane mode in my bag.



One night, about a month into my first year, I went out to XOYO. It was ‘Monday Monday’ which meant free entry before eleven. Pre-drinks was at one of my friend’s halls. There were maybe five of us and I remember getting bored and lacing a bottle of wine with vodka to get fucked quicker. By the time we got to Old Street I was in a state. We missed the free entry but I got in the club.



XOYO has two floors. The ground floor always played contemporary R&B and hip hop. The basement tech-house. I remember we started on the ground floor. There was a disco ball in the middle of the room which washed everything in red. The music was loud and it was busy. One of my friends accidently bumped into a girl and spilt her drink. She asked him to lick it off her arm.



We danced for a bit but I wasn’t enjoying it and was feeling sick so I went to the toilet. The queue for the cubical was long and I didn’t want to talk to anyone so I got out my phone and started scrolling through Instagram. Once I got in I locked it and threw up. I felt heavy and couldn’t really hear anything. When I finished I left and washed my hands.



I didn’t know where my friends were so I went over to the bar and ordered a Malibu and Coke. Someone asked me if I was okay and I ignored them.



I stumbled downstairs. It was dark and a strobe was flashing. The music was better and I started dancing but I felt awkward so I went over to the side and sat down. My head pounded. My eyes felt loose. I took a sip of my drink. Some guy in a floral shirt sat down next to me. I think he asked me what my name was. I got up and went to the downstairs toilet and threw up.



I walked back on to the dancefloor. I didn’t know what was going on. I felt people were looking at me. I decided to leave.



As I left the club I suddenly felt really cold. Some guy asked me if I wanted to buy any coke. I opened Citymapper and tried to work out how to get home. It came up with a route to a bus stop. I must have walked for about fifteen minutes. I had no idea where I was. I remember I had my hood up.



I made it to the bus stop and the bus came. I didn’t sit upstairs because I could hear people shouting. As we crossed London Bridge I felt more sober and I remember looking out the window and seeing Tower Bridge all lit up purple and red. It was like something out of Disney Land. The light reflected in the Thames.



When I got back to my halls I went to my bedroom and lay on my bed. My head hurt. I looked at the ceiling and then went on my phone and scrolled through Facebook. I was hot and I couldn’t open the window because there was a train-line outside. I saw a picture of one of my school friends at Warwick university sitting in a bush with a tinny. He lived on campus and the SU was only a couple minutes away. At some point I must have fallen asleep.



“Is anyone sitting here?”



“Go ahead.”










The Sea runs March 1-3 @ Camden People’s Theatre

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